Episode 50: Grief, Loss, and Pomegranates
|
It's the 50th Episode!!
It takes a team to put a podcast together, and we're celebrating our happy Heart Healing team briefly today, before we get on to pomegranates and what they have to do with grief and loss. So, hoorah to all you listeners, and our gratitude for listening and getting us to 50 freaking episodes!! Grief is sometimes like opening a pomegranate So, on with those pomegranates. 'Tis the season for fresh poms, but if you've ever eaten a fresh one, you know how tricky retrieving those tasty seeds can be. (For help, see video below!) So what's the tie with grief? Come listen to Grief Coach Wendy Sloneker and find out. It'll be worth your while. |
Wendy celebrates her 50th episode and shares her thoughts on how opening a pomegranate relates to grief and loss.
|
You are Invited
And if you find yourself with a hankering for either pomegranates or tools to help yourself or a loved one through grief and loss, well, we can't really help with the fruit, but you can make an appointment for a complimentary consult with Wendy on her website https://www.wendysloneker.com/ for those invaluable tools.
Then join us for the dance party. :)
Mentioned in this episode:
And if you find yourself with a hankering for either pomegranates or tools to help yourself or a loved one through grief and loss, well, we can't really help with the fruit, but you can make an appointment for a complimentary consult with Wendy on her website https://www.wendysloneker.com/ for those invaluable tools.
Then join us for the dance party. :)
Mentioned in this episode:
- Wendy's Facebook page (DANCE PARTY): https://www.facebook.com/hearthealingloss
- How to Deseed a Pomegranate in 1 Minute: https://youtu.be/6YInVpUiv5c
- Audiotocracy Podcast Production: https://audiotocracy.com
- Eric Verlinde: https://www.ericverlinde.com/
- Sarah Truden: https://sarahtruden.com/
As seen on: |
|
Full Episode Transcript
Wendy Sloneker
You are listening to the Heart Healing from Loss podcast with Wendy Sloneker. Y'all, this is episode 50.
Oh my gosh. It's kind of a stellar achievement. 50 episodes of you and me hanging out. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. It's a delight.
And I would also like to shout out and delight in the following folks who helped me put this holding thing together and that is Audiotocracy Team. That is Shannon, Heather, Nick, Dane, Kim. I hope I'm not missing anybody. Oh my gosh. Also, Sarah, thank you to my own dear and lovely person who helps me with loads of things behind the scenes so these podcasts can get to you. Thank you, Sarah. Brilliant. There is one other person that I would also like to shout out to and that is Eric Verlinde. Who created the score for this podcast. Yep, custom music for me, for you for our hearts for the world. That that pretty much doesn't get any more inclusive than that.
Hi, I want to talk a little bit today about grief loss and pomegranates. Stay with me a story is involved. At the time of this recording, it is the December month last month of 2022 friends. December is pomegranate season that is when fresh pomegranates are available in the stores to buy now. Just stay with me for one more second. I have a person who lives that I live with we live together I love her. And she adores pomegranate she wants pomegranates at all times in most any form. She even likes wants and loves the little cups of pomegranates that are available in local stores throughout now there's an obscene price on these little cups of pomegranate seeds or arils as they are sometimes called there I am getting fancy but the seeds I know them as seeds we're just going with that the seeds. The way that you cut into a pomegranate or bring out the seeds is often messy.
So there are many layers to what could be the story here but here's the one I'm going with. My lovely beloved adores pomegranates. And I it does take some time and care to I don't know break open, cut open get in there get the seeds out. When they're fresh, it's infinitely better when we unseeded a pomegranate the other day and a third of one pomegranate was kind of equal to a cup. Now this is not an economy class. I'm just saying there's value and volume in the fresh.
Okay, so how does this relate to grief and loss? Well often when it comes to me, Ah, I don't want to cut into or find out how to do a better way of cutting into and deseeding pomegranate. I know she loves these things. I would love to be there and create that for her. In addition so little cups of of seeds great. It's a delight. Yes. Often I find I have resistance about going in figuring it out. And then sort of like producing said cup of finished product tiny seeds that are perfect and like little jewels that you eat. And so lusciously read that it looks like precious gems that you put into your body delicious. On purpose.
So I was thinking this morning that grief and loss as a topic. If you're in a season of grief and loss us as we are in a season of pomegranates, you may just not want to deal with the mess. Anyone relevant anyone going into a pomegranate and you know, there are lots and lots of YouTube videos, I have ways of getting into a pomegranate that was the beading on the, you know, the skin or the husk of the fruit. With a wooden spoon, I've seen that that works, it doesn't really work for me. But doing the cut thing over the top, I will include a link, not a problem.
But finding a better way of getting in there. So there's less mess is another way of doing it. This is the same for grief and loss. There are less messy, more efficient ways of getting in there, taking care of the heartbreak. And then moving on. One thing I was thinking about was because I made quite a mess this morning, when full transparency friends made a big mess, cutting into a pomegranate even though I knew how to do it, lwhen you pull it apart with your hands. There is still not 100% total control. I had, like the fruit flew all over the counter. It's a it's a white marble Lee kind of quartzite counter. And it looks pretty gruesome. When a pomegranate kind of get spilled and the juice goes all over. I mentioned bright red. So, you know, wow, what if it's not that big of a deal to clean it up? Because that's what happened? Do I have the time and space to go in? Get the fruit for my person who loves it? And am I willing to clean up the mess?
Similar and relevant to grief and loss? Anyone? It is for me? Because there is a part of our healthy human brains that are like, Oh, no, it'll take forever, I can't possibly get in there. And that's us being afraid. Resistance. Yeah. Or that's, you know, I'm too mad. I don't want to deal with it right now. Okay. Okay, is there a better way? Maybe these are the things that I think about and work on with my clients. Oftentimes, I don't want to go into hard feelings. Because one, I don't know what I'm gonna feel, I don't know what the mess is going to look like. It was not a pleasure to see red, all over my kitchen counter from fruit. But it was also possible to clean it up without it being a real big deal, either.
This is the thing that we forget about. And so having support through through the mess, or no matter how big and no matter how small. It's, it's an option. I just want to say, hey, what if the value on the other side is way more based on the tedious work of getting in there and getting those seeds out? Getting to the core of it. There's no actual corn and pomegranate I know.
But getting to the seeds, cleaning up what needs to be cleaned up and then enjoying the fruit or delivering the fruit or being more present. Oh my gosh, I feel so good and satisfied on the other side of getting like hundreds of seeds out of one piece of fruit for my beloved to enjoy. Regardless of what that takes, like, yep, can I do it? Yep, I got 15 minutes, or going for a third? And then we're going for a third. And then we're going for a third. It works and it can you can allow it to work. That's an option too.
These are my thoughts. I'm cleaning up the mess that comes up just right now. We want have you had the tools to clean up the mess of a messy feeling. Often we're so afraid of the mess that we kind of forget that. Yeah, how about if I just clean up the mess is not not a big deal when you're in it.
This is another scenario where the anticipation is often worse or unpleasant or less pleasant than the actual doing. Also similar. Also similar parallel almost like the anticipation can often be worse than the actual going through in the unpacking. Can grief and loss be tedious? Uh huh. Yeah, for a little while.
But to have that space available to have that nourishment and nutrient like capacity available for you. pretty huge to know how to do that on demand, and not carry around old hurts or bitterness or loss or heartbreak or resentment, if I'm honest, useful, useful.
There are lots and lots of ways of getting there. There's lots and lots of ways that we can get into our much compartmentalized fruit of old experience and get those seeds out. They are valuable it's part of being alive, and also feeling more alive. I feel satisfied after I deseed to pomegranate. I even have some seeds along the way myself. Don't tell my beloved. She knows.
Anyway. These are my thoughts this morning. Grief loss and pomegranates. Resisting a mess is totally fine. There are times when you know, it's not time to deseed to pomegranate or to go through grief and loss for pomegranates. That's anytime I'm wearing anything that looks like light colored clothing. I know myself, if I'm in something I would be willing to paint a room in. Yes. Get me there.
There's times when it's not right to go through grief or loss or heartbreak to you get to decide. You get to decide when not to. And you get to decide when you want to. Too. So when you're ready. I'm ready for you. Yeah, I think that's it for now.
Thank you for 50 episodes. Oh my gosh, when I started this podcast, I did not think that I would, I didn't think about getting to a 50th episode. Now that we're all here together, it does feel a little bit like a party. So pre party pre publishing, post party post publishing. Come visit me on my personal Facebook page. And we'll do a lovely shout out and mini dance party, totally mini dance party a total. I did not think I was gonna say that. But it looks like dance parties happening next Tuesday.
Thank you for being here. I appreciate you so much. And I wish you so well. Okay, talk to you next week. Bye. Yeah.
Hi, this is Wendy, thank you so much for being here and spending time with me for you. Yeah, the whole purpose of walking through grief and loss is to find out how to feel better. Did you know there are tools and skills to be learned about how to do this? Yeah, for real, and I do it. Let's get on a connection call. It's a 45 minute Free call. We'd love to offer to you when you're ready. And we'll just see if we'd be a good fit to work together.
If you're ready for a little more support, and not less, and if you're ready to feel a little bit better. And to find out how to learn these tools and skills. I'm ready for you. Reach out through my website. Connect with me directly from [email protected] and we'll set it up. Heck yeah, we will.
All right. Till then take really good bye
You are listening to the Heart Healing from Loss podcast with Wendy Sloneker. Y'all, this is episode 50.
Oh my gosh. It's kind of a stellar achievement. 50 episodes of you and me hanging out. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. It's a delight.
And I would also like to shout out and delight in the following folks who helped me put this holding thing together and that is Audiotocracy Team. That is Shannon, Heather, Nick, Dane, Kim. I hope I'm not missing anybody. Oh my gosh. Also, Sarah, thank you to my own dear and lovely person who helps me with loads of things behind the scenes so these podcasts can get to you. Thank you, Sarah. Brilliant. There is one other person that I would also like to shout out to and that is Eric Verlinde. Who created the score for this podcast. Yep, custom music for me, for you for our hearts for the world. That that pretty much doesn't get any more inclusive than that.
Hi, I want to talk a little bit today about grief loss and pomegranates. Stay with me a story is involved. At the time of this recording, it is the December month last month of 2022 friends. December is pomegranate season that is when fresh pomegranates are available in the stores to buy now. Just stay with me for one more second. I have a person who lives that I live with we live together I love her. And she adores pomegranate she wants pomegranates at all times in most any form. She even likes wants and loves the little cups of pomegranates that are available in local stores throughout now there's an obscene price on these little cups of pomegranate seeds or arils as they are sometimes called there I am getting fancy but the seeds I know them as seeds we're just going with that the seeds. The way that you cut into a pomegranate or bring out the seeds is often messy.
So there are many layers to what could be the story here but here's the one I'm going with. My lovely beloved adores pomegranates. And I it does take some time and care to I don't know break open, cut open get in there get the seeds out. When they're fresh, it's infinitely better when we unseeded a pomegranate the other day and a third of one pomegranate was kind of equal to a cup. Now this is not an economy class. I'm just saying there's value and volume in the fresh.
Okay, so how does this relate to grief and loss? Well often when it comes to me, Ah, I don't want to cut into or find out how to do a better way of cutting into and deseeding pomegranate. I know she loves these things. I would love to be there and create that for her. In addition so little cups of of seeds great. It's a delight. Yes. Often I find I have resistance about going in figuring it out. And then sort of like producing said cup of finished product tiny seeds that are perfect and like little jewels that you eat. And so lusciously read that it looks like precious gems that you put into your body delicious. On purpose.
So I was thinking this morning that grief and loss as a topic. If you're in a season of grief and loss us as we are in a season of pomegranates, you may just not want to deal with the mess. Anyone relevant anyone going into a pomegranate and you know, there are lots and lots of YouTube videos, I have ways of getting into a pomegranate that was the beading on the, you know, the skin or the husk of the fruit. With a wooden spoon, I've seen that that works, it doesn't really work for me. But doing the cut thing over the top, I will include a link, not a problem.
But finding a better way of getting in there. So there's less mess is another way of doing it. This is the same for grief and loss. There are less messy, more efficient ways of getting in there, taking care of the heartbreak. And then moving on. One thing I was thinking about was because I made quite a mess this morning, when full transparency friends made a big mess, cutting into a pomegranate even though I knew how to do it, lwhen you pull it apart with your hands. There is still not 100% total control. I had, like the fruit flew all over the counter. It's a it's a white marble Lee kind of quartzite counter. And it looks pretty gruesome. When a pomegranate kind of get spilled and the juice goes all over. I mentioned bright red. So, you know, wow, what if it's not that big of a deal to clean it up? Because that's what happened? Do I have the time and space to go in? Get the fruit for my person who loves it? And am I willing to clean up the mess?
Similar and relevant to grief and loss? Anyone? It is for me? Because there is a part of our healthy human brains that are like, Oh, no, it'll take forever, I can't possibly get in there. And that's us being afraid. Resistance. Yeah. Or that's, you know, I'm too mad. I don't want to deal with it right now. Okay. Okay, is there a better way? Maybe these are the things that I think about and work on with my clients. Oftentimes, I don't want to go into hard feelings. Because one, I don't know what I'm gonna feel, I don't know what the mess is going to look like. It was not a pleasure to see red, all over my kitchen counter from fruit. But it was also possible to clean it up without it being a real big deal, either.
This is the thing that we forget about. And so having support through through the mess, or no matter how big and no matter how small. It's, it's an option. I just want to say, hey, what if the value on the other side is way more based on the tedious work of getting in there and getting those seeds out? Getting to the core of it. There's no actual corn and pomegranate I know.
But getting to the seeds, cleaning up what needs to be cleaned up and then enjoying the fruit or delivering the fruit or being more present. Oh my gosh, I feel so good and satisfied on the other side of getting like hundreds of seeds out of one piece of fruit for my beloved to enjoy. Regardless of what that takes, like, yep, can I do it? Yep, I got 15 minutes, or going for a third? And then we're going for a third. And then we're going for a third. It works and it can you can allow it to work. That's an option too.
These are my thoughts. I'm cleaning up the mess that comes up just right now. We want have you had the tools to clean up the mess of a messy feeling. Often we're so afraid of the mess that we kind of forget that. Yeah, how about if I just clean up the mess is not not a big deal when you're in it.
This is another scenario where the anticipation is often worse or unpleasant or less pleasant than the actual doing. Also similar. Also similar parallel almost like the anticipation can often be worse than the actual going through in the unpacking. Can grief and loss be tedious? Uh huh. Yeah, for a little while.
But to have that space available to have that nourishment and nutrient like capacity available for you. pretty huge to know how to do that on demand, and not carry around old hurts or bitterness or loss or heartbreak or resentment, if I'm honest, useful, useful.
There are lots and lots of ways of getting there. There's lots and lots of ways that we can get into our much compartmentalized fruit of old experience and get those seeds out. They are valuable it's part of being alive, and also feeling more alive. I feel satisfied after I deseed to pomegranate. I even have some seeds along the way myself. Don't tell my beloved. She knows.
Anyway. These are my thoughts this morning. Grief loss and pomegranates. Resisting a mess is totally fine. There are times when you know, it's not time to deseed to pomegranate or to go through grief and loss for pomegranates. That's anytime I'm wearing anything that looks like light colored clothing. I know myself, if I'm in something I would be willing to paint a room in. Yes. Get me there.
There's times when it's not right to go through grief or loss or heartbreak to you get to decide. You get to decide when not to. And you get to decide when you want to. Too. So when you're ready. I'm ready for you. Yeah, I think that's it for now.
Thank you for 50 episodes. Oh my gosh, when I started this podcast, I did not think that I would, I didn't think about getting to a 50th episode. Now that we're all here together, it does feel a little bit like a party. So pre party pre publishing, post party post publishing. Come visit me on my personal Facebook page. And we'll do a lovely shout out and mini dance party, totally mini dance party a total. I did not think I was gonna say that. But it looks like dance parties happening next Tuesday.
Thank you for being here. I appreciate you so much. And I wish you so well. Okay, talk to you next week. Bye. Yeah.
Hi, this is Wendy, thank you so much for being here and spending time with me for you. Yeah, the whole purpose of walking through grief and loss is to find out how to feel better. Did you know there are tools and skills to be learned about how to do this? Yeah, for real, and I do it. Let's get on a connection call. It's a 45 minute Free call. We'd love to offer to you when you're ready. And we'll just see if we'd be a good fit to work together.
If you're ready for a little more support, and not less, and if you're ready to feel a little bit better. And to find out how to learn these tools and skills. I'm ready for you. Reach out through my website. Connect with me directly from [email protected] and we'll set it up. Heck yeah, we will.
All right. Till then take really good bye
