Episode 14: “Zooming Out” from Overwhelm in a Grief, Loss, or Shadow Season
Emergence Coach Wendy Sloneker talks about “Zooming out” in this episode. Before you log into that 3rd video chat of the day or “unmute” your mic and camera, just wait. Take a second to take a breath.
This practice of “Zooming out” is an exercise for your imagination. It’s a way to stay grounded when the feelings of grief or loss get overwhelming, and you’re not quite ready to face a “Zoomful” of people. Think of Zooming out as taking a step back in those moments when the feelings are big. Remember: these moments have a before, a during, and an after. Be willing to stay aware while you are overwhelmed or anxious, so you can use the “Zoom out” as a way to take a step back and see the bigger picture. |
Zooming out or taking a step back, big or small, can be a way to gain some perspective and let the path forward make itself a little more clear.
If you are ready to get some support in your Emergence journey, connect with Wendy at wendysloneker.com.
Big Blue Marble intro
Georges Seurat
As seen on: |
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Full Episode Transcript
Wendy Sloneker
You are listening to the Emergence from Life's Biggest Obstacles podcast, with Wendy Sloneker. This is episode 14. Hello, and welcome to this little moment, this little lessons little exchange, which can actually be big.
What I'm offering today and sharing about is a practice. And it's actually a concept for you to try on before you actually do anything. So how about I splain it, it's called zooming out. Now this has nothing to do with video meetings or camera function, or anything else. This is a conceptual practice that you do with your imagination. I don't know if you remember this or not. And if you don't remember it, you're not familiar with it yet, please check your local YouTube, which is global. And see if you can find the big blue marble intro.
Now for those of you in the Gen X. Or, or older segments of life, you're gonna remember the big blue marble. It was a show. Often, I think it was a Sunday morning show. But it had a pan out of, of the earth like we zoomed in and out from like one space, one little patch into space. And this is what I'd like us to practice with.
Now that's not just it, that's not it. When you're faced with a moment of overwhelm, or anxiety, or fear, or you're blindsided by a session of grief or loss, the instinct may be too bolt, understandable. Like you got hormones going on, you got a chemical dump out of your brain, hormones, cortisol stress, not the fun ones. And so, consider just if you can remember that you want to try this. This is the moment or if you feel like you have a sense of a panic, or just sorrow, staying with yourself, and encouraging yourself to remember, as you zoom out, it can be you know, figuratively, it can be well, it needs to be figuratively, because we can't do it literally just yet on the planet. Hilarious Wendy.
Give yourself a sense of it's, your brain may want to overthink it. But having a sense of or feeling it. Or just remembering the concept is enough. It's enough. Having a sense of stepping back, having a sense of zooming out, as you remember, this moment is a before, during, and after. I wrote about this in the blog this week, and it had me thinking just a little bit more about it. So in the blog post I mentioned, you know, like every moment we see with our eyes or sense or perceive. It's all a moment that is before. It's also a during and it's also an after we totally forget this, I forget this. I completely forget this because oh the humanity. Our human brains and the factory settings on our human brains are so they can get so myopic. So this is only the only thing that I see. This is the only thing I remember about this person or this time in my life, or this event.
And in truth in resonant, deeper truth. It wasn't before. And it wasn't during and it wasn't after. This can feel so challenging and difficult. But if you get to a moment, like please bookmark this podcast and just listen through, like from moment for minute, 25 seconds for a minute or two and you're just going to hear it exactly what you just heard. To walk you through it until you can walk yourself through it. B, D, A, non BT A No, no, no, B, D, A before, during, after. And you're having a moment.
Grief happens in moments, like big feelings come in. For moments we forget also that we're having other moments. I do. I am only saying we because I'm also including myself here. Heck yes. So, before, during and after. Now this is this may feel a little bit like what?
Let me also suggest that we are flooded with before and after on social media who doesn't love a big reveal, right? The before and after the makeover the closet, clean out the landscape overhaul all of it. But here's the thing. On the screens, whether it's movie or TV or social media, they're all done like with the perfect sound bed, underneath it. And on social anyway, they've sped up the time, makeovers haircuts, closet cleanouts, wardrobes, new technologies, recipes, the whole thing.
Entertaining, yes. But before, during and after in real life is a lived experience. And they're all different. We love transition transformation, when we're viewing it and observing it. But sometimes, for some of the more painful ones, the more like rock your world times. We need to catch our breath. And so remembering that this is a before and during and after moment, is something you can not anchor on to. But recall the resonance of that if you can feel that, the truth of that if you remember, it is enough.
These are simple concepts. The real work is in the willingness to be aware. And that can be really a big ask for a big feeling. If you're afraid of them, 100% 100% we are sorely lacking in skills to feel and to be aware. And honestly, this is the thing that moves us through.
I want to give you one other example of zooming out just because just because that's the title. And I have carried this around and have mentioned it with clients. And I want to mention it with you too because podcasting, whether you're aware of it or not, whether you believe it or not, how I view it as that my listeners are working with me in a way in a way where my clients are anonymous to me, largely. And and this is this is also wide. This is how I serve many at a time. Yeah, so zooming out.
Go to your local YouTube, or Google, which is again global. And search for George Seurat. As you are at I think he painted a painting. He's got a list. And so what's important to know about Doddlism is, you know, or watch Ferris Bueller's Day Off. Yes. Or see if you can find the musical of Sunday in the Park with George of the same name. Please see the one with Bernadette Peters.
I saw it as a child in San Francisco back when we used to do field trips. That was back in the day. And I saw that musical. And there was this giant canvas that the character George based on George Seurat the doddlist he was painting on and what was important was he painted this massive like huge, large scaled, hashtag understatement image with only dots of different colors. And so what became really important in order to complete this painting and have it be recognizable as it is today, he had to step back, he had to step back. And look, he had to step back and look and observe. And this took a little bit of time, he had to step back so he could see, it sounds absurd, but it is 100% resonant truth.
And I hope it rings for you. This is something you can do as well, in small moments, I'm working in this podcast with your, your inside self, because grief is definitely an inside game, job experience, experiment, adventure path. And sometimes it really blows. So inside is where it counts. And sometimes, we need to take just a little step back. And sometimes we need to stay take a big step back. Big step backs does not mean setbacks. It means I gained ground so I can see.
So I can calm and nurture myself into a new state of awareness where I decide what's next for me. I listen for what's right. And I know what's next. This is how it works. This is what I have for you today. I am so glad you are here. Thank you for working with me. I look forward to one day, knowing who you are because largely friends. You're anonymous to me, as I mentioned. I love you from here. And I will speak to you again next week. Thanks for listening. Bye for now.
Listen, this is not the destination. The hard stuff is already hard enough. You don't have to make it any harder. You also don't have to wait. Waiting is optional. Connect with me for your free 45 minute connection call. We're going to talk about what private confidential grief coaching into emergence is like and whether or not that's right for you. This is your move. This is your precious life. Let's do this thing. Let's do it together. I'm looking forward to meeting you and I'll talk to you real soon.
You are listening to the Emergence from Life's Biggest Obstacles podcast, with Wendy Sloneker. This is episode 14. Hello, and welcome to this little moment, this little lessons little exchange, which can actually be big.
What I'm offering today and sharing about is a practice. And it's actually a concept for you to try on before you actually do anything. So how about I splain it, it's called zooming out. Now this has nothing to do with video meetings or camera function, or anything else. This is a conceptual practice that you do with your imagination. I don't know if you remember this or not. And if you don't remember it, you're not familiar with it yet, please check your local YouTube, which is global. And see if you can find the big blue marble intro.
Now for those of you in the Gen X. Or, or older segments of life, you're gonna remember the big blue marble. It was a show. Often, I think it was a Sunday morning show. But it had a pan out of, of the earth like we zoomed in and out from like one space, one little patch into space. And this is what I'd like us to practice with.
Now that's not just it, that's not it. When you're faced with a moment of overwhelm, or anxiety, or fear, or you're blindsided by a session of grief or loss, the instinct may be too bolt, understandable. Like you got hormones going on, you got a chemical dump out of your brain, hormones, cortisol stress, not the fun ones. And so, consider just if you can remember that you want to try this. This is the moment or if you feel like you have a sense of a panic, or just sorrow, staying with yourself, and encouraging yourself to remember, as you zoom out, it can be you know, figuratively, it can be well, it needs to be figuratively, because we can't do it literally just yet on the planet. Hilarious Wendy.
Give yourself a sense of it's, your brain may want to overthink it. But having a sense of or feeling it. Or just remembering the concept is enough. It's enough. Having a sense of stepping back, having a sense of zooming out, as you remember, this moment is a before, during, and after. I wrote about this in the blog this week, and it had me thinking just a little bit more about it. So in the blog post I mentioned, you know, like every moment we see with our eyes or sense or perceive. It's all a moment that is before. It's also a during and it's also an after we totally forget this, I forget this. I completely forget this because oh the humanity. Our human brains and the factory settings on our human brains are so they can get so myopic. So this is only the only thing that I see. This is the only thing I remember about this person or this time in my life, or this event.
And in truth in resonant, deeper truth. It wasn't before. And it wasn't during and it wasn't after. This can feel so challenging and difficult. But if you get to a moment, like please bookmark this podcast and just listen through, like from moment for minute, 25 seconds for a minute or two and you're just going to hear it exactly what you just heard. To walk you through it until you can walk yourself through it. B, D, A, non BT A No, no, no, B, D, A before, during, after. And you're having a moment.
Grief happens in moments, like big feelings come in. For moments we forget also that we're having other moments. I do. I am only saying we because I'm also including myself here. Heck yes. So, before, during and after. Now this is this may feel a little bit like what?
Let me also suggest that we are flooded with before and after on social media who doesn't love a big reveal, right? The before and after the makeover the closet, clean out the landscape overhaul all of it. But here's the thing. On the screens, whether it's movie or TV or social media, they're all done like with the perfect sound bed, underneath it. And on social anyway, they've sped up the time, makeovers haircuts, closet cleanouts, wardrobes, new technologies, recipes, the whole thing.
Entertaining, yes. But before, during and after in real life is a lived experience. And they're all different. We love transition transformation, when we're viewing it and observing it. But sometimes, for some of the more painful ones, the more like rock your world times. We need to catch our breath. And so remembering that this is a before and during and after moment, is something you can not anchor on to. But recall the resonance of that if you can feel that, the truth of that if you remember, it is enough.
These are simple concepts. The real work is in the willingness to be aware. And that can be really a big ask for a big feeling. If you're afraid of them, 100% 100% we are sorely lacking in skills to feel and to be aware. And honestly, this is the thing that moves us through.
I want to give you one other example of zooming out just because just because that's the title. And I have carried this around and have mentioned it with clients. And I want to mention it with you too because podcasting, whether you're aware of it or not, whether you believe it or not, how I view it as that my listeners are working with me in a way in a way where my clients are anonymous to me, largely. And and this is this is also wide. This is how I serve many at a time. Yeah, so zooming out.
Go to your local YouTube, or Google, which is again global. And search for George Seurat. As you are at I think he painted a painting. He's got a list. And so what's important to know about Doddlism is, you know, or watch Ferris Bueller's Day Off. Yes. Or see if you can find the musical of Sunday in the Park with George of the same name. Please see the one with Bernadette Peters.
I saw it as a child in San Francisco back when we used to do field trips. That was back in the day. And I saw that musical. And there was this giant canvas that the character George based on George Seurat the doddlist he was painting on and what was important was he painted this massive like huge, large scaled, hashtag understatement image with only dots of different colors. And so what became really important in order to complete this painting and have it be recognizable as it is today, he had to step back, he had to step back. And look, he had to step back and look and observe. And this took a little bit of time, he had to step back so he could see, it sounds absurd, but it is 100% resonant truth.
And I hope it rings for you. This is something you can do as well, in small moments, I'm working in this podcast with your, your inside self, because grief is definitely an inside game, job experience, experiment, adventure path. And sometimes it really blows. So inside is where it counts. And sometimes, we need to take just a little step back. And sometimes we need to stay take a big step back. Big step backs does not mean setbacks. It means I gained ground so I can see.
So I can calm and nurture myself into a new state of awareness where I decide what's next for me. I listen for what's right. And I know what's next. This is how it works. This is what I have for you today. I am so glad you are here. Thank you for working with me. I look forward to one day, knowing who you are because largely friends. You're anonymous to me, as I mentioned. I love you from here. And I will speak to you again next week. Thanks for listening. Bye for now.
Listen, this is not the destination. The hard stuff is already hard enough. You don't have to make it any harder. You also don't have to wait. Waiting is optional. Connect with me for your free 45 minute connection call. We're going to talk about what private confidential grief coaching into emergence is like and whether or not that's right for you. This is your move. This is your precious life. Let's do this thing. Let's do it together. I'm looking forward to meeting you and I'll talk to you real soon.